There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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