I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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