fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
