Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
