i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
