I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
