We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
