my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
He better not be in your backpack
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
