I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
