I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
