Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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