Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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