..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
