Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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