when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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