Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
