Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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