im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize