im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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