It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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