come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
