you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
