I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
bring money and cleavage
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
