I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
