woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
