Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Vodka?
Forever.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
