Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
