I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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