Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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