you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize