Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
So much Jack, so little girl.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
