Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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