Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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