i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
