Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
