i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
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