I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
