Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
