I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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