why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize