is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
