Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Terrible idea I love it
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
