Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
