I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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