What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I think I am morally bankrupt
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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