So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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