I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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