yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
