If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
