She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
